Wednesday, December 2, 2009


I have been in Teluk Intan for almost two weeks. I am going to UM Youth Camp in the coming Monday. I have not done my homework for the camp. Kind of worry. Going to eat more than 100 pages of thingy. Buddha bless me. haha..
Well, went to watch 2012 with Wei Fong last Monday. It was such a great movie. After i watched the movie, I started to feel scare of the day. 2012, will it come and will it becomes reality?What will happen to me if the day come? Will I have a chance to do everything that i wish to do? Will I regret after all?I will not know. But that day, i went to DYC opening ceremony, Rev. Sampano had gave a very good speech on that day. I can get the point of live our life to the fullest as long as we still can breath. It's true. Many people will plan for their future but never appreciate the present. We will not know what will happen in the future, not even the next second. It is always better for us to live life to the fullest and appreciate the present.
This Tuesday, had a gathering with my former form 6 classmates. We had a steamboat gathering at Poh Loong. It's such a great gathering. It has been a thousands of years i have not seen Peck Geok and Sheue Chia. Finally, i met them during the gathering. We had such a big dinner that day.I ate a lot. My diet plan failed as well. Haha...But it is ok. As long as we all happy. Had my belated birthday present from Peck Geok, Sin Yee and Lay Ying. TSCL is back. I miss those time we were together. Still remember Peck Geok always made me laugh when we walked to canteen from our classroom. She had a lot of funny movement which made me laugh from my heart. Still remember that we love to chop body glove on each other. The time we play together is the most memorable one for me. After we went to University, there is no such happiness for me anymore.
This few weeks, was feeling so sweet and protected. Love staying in your heart^^

Monday, November 9, 2009


Yen is Sleeping+sms-ing+avoiding from the camera+reading. 4 in 1.

ZW, Timm and Me.

Yen, Marilynn and Faiz

Xiao Yao and me


Monkey pose

Plastisin with little xiao yao

Plastisin that we after we came back from Sunway Pyramid No. 1

We are cousins ..Yeah!!!Grandma and Xiao Yao
Well…Well, it has been a long time I have not update my news here. I was having a very busy week before my study week where I had settled almost everything before I started my study week. However, there were still 2 assignments left behind for me to complete during my study week. I went back to my hometown on 22 October 2009 and came back to university on 25 October 2009. I wished I could stay at home for a longer period, but I can’t as I have to come back here to finish my assignments which due on 27 October 2009 and 30 October 2009 respectively. Anyway, some may ask me, why I can’t do my assignment while I am at home. I have to say that, once I reach home, I will become a big lazy worm and sleeping beauty. Haha~ I slept from night to the morning and continue sleeping again. Almost 24 hours I will use to sleep. That is when I recharge my energy. Thus, I can’t really spend my study week at home, or else, it will end up with nothing.
Once I reached my college, I started to do my first assignment, which is for poetry. This time, I had a different poem from what I have done before. No more sex, no more love, no more death. Now, it changed to the theme of learning. Ahem~ it sounds nice to have a theme out of all those love, sex and death. Yet, it is kind of hard to analyze that poem. It took me almost one day to finish it. I managed to finish it the day before date of submission. I am really glad of myself. (I am giving myself a big clap) haha… Then, after I submitted the assignment, Oong and I had our lunch at Rumah Universiti. The foods there taste good. After I had bought my food, then only I realized that my cousin sister had send me a message that she is coming to have lunch with me. OMG. ok..Never mind. I had not taken my breakfast. So, what I ate in Rumah University is my breakfast and will continue for my lunch with my cousin sister. Hmm..Sounds like I am trying to bluff myself so that I can eat more. Yaya..I am..I had a nice lunch with my cousin sister and Joo Huat that day. I feel good.
I have just finished one of my assignments that left over, I have another assignment to rush on and the submission date is 30th October 2009. However, I plan to finish my assignment on 28th October 2009 so that I can go to Mid Valley and watch Meatball with Zhong Weng. Anyway, when I opened my e-mail and checked for the mail from my group members, I got a big headache and fire was burning in me. What the hell they were doing? They don’t really understand what I said or they can’t even understand my Malay? I asked them to go back and change the point form data into essay, that’s all. Everything is prepared, they just have to combine them and write an essay. But what they did was they copy and pasted the whole page for me. That’s all. OMG!!! If I want that thing, I can do it myself. Furthermore, I am not the leader of this assignment. The leader had not done anything at all. GOSH! I was yelling and screaming in my room and scolded everything they have done. I have to do it myself. Anyway, lucky Yayan, Fyza and Azma had finished some of the part. So, I rushed until 5a.m. and slept for 4 hours and woke up to continue. Finally, I finished it on 11.12a.m. 28 October 2009. Phew… Finally, I can go and watch Meatball happily. So, I went to watch Meatball with ZHong Weng in the afternoon and had a super valuable lunch in Ipoh Chicken Rice in The Gardens. We met Chia Sing, Amy Stephanie and Dayang in Mid Valley. We were wondering, why TESL-ians’ study week does not seem like a study week but movie week or shopping week. Yea, it’s true that TESL-ian is really enjoying themselves during study week. May be not all, but at least, most of us are. ( I am going to be beaten by other courses students. Sorry! Hehe)
After finished all assignments and movie, my study week finally started on 29 October 2009 where I started to do revision on my first paper- Reading in ESL classroom. I don’t have much knowledge on this course as I did not pay attention during class but “fishing” at the back. It was too boring and dull where I had tried my very best to stay awake yet I could not. Finally, 4 November 2009 reached where I had my first paper. It was kind of easy for me. I should have not read all the notes but search the information through the internet. That’s enough. Anyway, I did learn something from there as well. Once my first paper finished, Faiz, Timm, Marilynn, Zhong Weng, Shin Yen and I went to Mid Valley. They went for a movie, I went to get my present for my little cousin sister and my buddy. We had our dinner at Sushi King. It was just like our last paper, not our first paper after all. Haha…
Then, I came to my uncle’s house from Thursday night until today(Sunday). I had an enjoyable weekend here. Why I am here? I should have studied in room. Well, I brought along my notes to my uncle’s house. I managed to finish everything for Otto’s examination and also half of the notes of KBKK. So, it’s kind of success. I like the feeling of being with my grandmother, my uncle’s family, and my little cousin sister. She is such a cute girl. She speaks English much more fluent than me. I feel kind of shame when I speak to her. She is only 3 years old this year. Her English is just like the native speakers’ English. But her Chinese is just like an English girl speaking Chinese. Haha…I love her so much and she loves me too. (She just played with me while she doesn’t play with my sister and my brother. Once she came back to KL, she always looking for me. Whoever phone to her house, she will say “biao jie, come and play with me.” see, how she missed me. haha)
Finally, I am back to College again. Miss the life in my uncle’s house so much. How good it is if I can stay there longer? I will have my second paper, Poetry I tomorrow and third paper KBKK on Wednesday. Wish that I can make it and score in both papers. I can do it. Right? will update my post again during coming weekend and elaborate more on what had happen. Stay tune!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

I can do it!

The feeling of sadness was all around me. Just came back from a best friend's father funeral. There were so many things happened within these few days. I have to accept all these as truth and they will not change anymore. I miss my dad so much when I was in the funeral. I flashed back the time when my dad’s funeral. I was still young, I was just following what the adults said and do whatever they asked me to do. I am the eldest daughter in my family. I have to take over the entire job that my brother has to do because he was still an 8 year old boy who did not know anything. Now, he is already a 17 years old boy. Everything changes. Life is really impermanent. This minute, you might see the flowers blooming, yet the next minute they might be dead.
I was having a short conversation with Sis.Ooi and Joo Huat yesterday night. We were discussing on the topic of coupling. For normal case, in second year of university life, one should have found their partner. Yet, I am not. I am single. I said being single is better. However, deep in my heart, this is an ambiguous case. Sometime, i would like to have a shoulder which could let me rest when i am tired. Yet, when it comes to me to have one or more shoulders to choose, i have chosen the wrong one which lead me to suffering and heart breaking. I am glad that I am single now. Instead, luckily we did not meet at last. Though I am kinda of hard to let go, I have letting it go slowly..I need some time...

I will feel jealous when I see my friends become couple one by one. Yet, i feel glad when i see my friend break up with their couple where i need not face the sadness. Now i feel it.It is like a knife cutting your heart. Tears is the blood from your heart that rolling down automatically, and non-stop. I was trying to ask myself whether it is my fault or what. I have tried my best to change myself, to change my attitude which is demanding and childish to suit him so that I can maintain the relationship. However, I failed…totally failed. How many tones of tears could not make it success as well? I have to let go. it’s time to let go. being single is good also. Less to worry and less thing to think of. i am glad now. I chose the right way again. back to single…
Life gona continue. I have to be strong and even stronger than before. I have no energy for anything like this. I have to put all my energy and effort into my college activity, my academic and also PBUM. Kai Chur gambateh!! Siew Ling, Gambateh too ya!!!^^

Wednesday, October 14, 2009


WHY?? can you tell me why??? Even though I have changed myself to make this a success, yet you said I changed to suit you is not the original me. I have tried my very best to maintain it..Why can't i make it? heart broken...WHY is it so?

I don't want to think of it anymore, yet it is haunted me day and night...
I don't want to cry, yet i am crying once I see the sky
I don't want sadness, yet it comes towards me...
I have to grow up, concentrate on my study and make my study my priority now.
I have to wake up and walk further towards my future
I have to stop thinking of the bastard, and go for the good
I have to grow stronger to fight against sadness
I have to take away the hatred and love myself more...
I have to...
I can do it...

Sunday, October 11, 2009


不要孩子气,我可以吗?我开始想,从何时开始,我变得如此孩子气?从前的我,不是这样的。没人说我孩子气,没人说我太小孩,是何时开始?我自己也没察觉。谢谢你告诉我。我会尽量的改过。 很想哭,但没哭。还是要坚强。。。我是坚强的,不是吗?我是在掩饰我内心的懦弱,我是吗?我很像剖开自己,看清自己,到底我是怎样的一个人。会觉得我很假,明明是懦弱,还要装坚强。是环境让我成为现在的我吗?是因为单亲,所以塑造出一幅自信的样子,不让别人欺负我???我到底可以找到我吗?

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Da Vinci - The Genius Exhibition 2009, Malaysia

Da Vinci - The Genius has come to Malaysia! There are 188 exhibits in National Science Centre, Bukit Kiara from Oct 1, 2009 until January 17, 2101. I've always wanted to see the paintings (esp the Last Supper) and i can't believe they're here!

"Direct from Italy, this world acclaimed exhibition from the II Genio de Leonardo da Vinci Museo brings to life Leonardo's genius as an inventor, artist, scientist, anatomist, engineer and architect. Over the past decade, a cadre of Italian artisans has been translating an old Florentine dialect and deciphering Da Vinci's shorthand to being his ideas to life."

Wait no more. Log on to for more information and IF YOU WANT FREE TICKETS, GO HERE =D

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Few memorable dates in my 2nd year 1st sem...

Well, there are few dates that I would like to jot down in my diary here.
This is a historical date. Why do I say so??? My journey of becoming the exco of PBUM started on this day. This is the day which I nominated to become the Pengerusi Jawatankuasa Seksyen Sosial of PBUM. I have been struggled for many days before I went to nominate to become EXCO. I have a lot of worries in me. I worried that I don't have enough time to handle so many things in once, I have lesser time to go home, I have no time to have outing with my coursemates and friends and so on. There are too much of worries in me. My heart divided into two parts, 1 part wish to become EXCO, another part feel so scare to take up the job. It continued until the day before nomination, I went to Buddhist House and had dinner together with Ji Chi Shi Fu. She had reminded me that there was a batch of seniors who brought me and guided me throughout the year, it's time for me to contribute to PBUM. Besides, I had a long chat with Zhi Ming, he did tell me a lot of things that made me feel that I should become a part of EXCO.


My brother's 17th birthday. I didn't plan to go home this week. But something pulled me back. I miss home so much. Thus, I went to buy ticket from KPS after the nomination and run back on that day. Luckily, I was back at home to celebrate my brother's birthday. Time passed...So fast, he is 17th years old now. He is taller than me now. A little boy had grew up to become a youth. Though the celebration was not a big one, yet, it's nice to be with family. I enjoyed and appreciate the time being with my family now.


Another big day in my university life. This is the day which we have our Annual General Meeting of PBUM. This is the day, I become the EXCO of PBUM. I am EXCO now.There is no way for me to step back. What i can do is look forward and stride the noble path with my team mates. I am sure we can make it and try our very best to take care of PBUM. YEAH!!!


CC trip to Pangkor. It's a nice trip to enjoy myself with all the CC members. I love you all. It's great to have you all with us. thanks for attending the trip. Without you all, the trip is meaningless.


Had dinner with shin yen's family and zhong weng. enjoy the time being together with them. Yen's parents are nice. Zhong Weng stayed in my house for 2 days. Sorry zhong weng for not giving u a memorable trip where I didnt bring you to visit to any place. But, Teluk Intan is really small where you can visit it within half day. Haha...Anyway, hope u did enjoy they time being with my family.


Attended a camp by PBUM. Where we started to take over the job from the ex-exco. It's a nice camp where I learnt a lot and know much about PBUM. There are a lot of things that I have to take care of. THis is a great chance for 13 of us, the exco, to gather and know each other better. Now, we are a family. Great!!! In this camp, I had a lao dou, Guo Xiang..THanks for teaching me everything about my post. I will try my best de, lao dou, dont worry^^..

Sunday, September 6, 2009

A day...

I woke up early in the morning today. It was 6.05a.m. Some people might think that why am I wake up so early today?'s because I went to a Dana with my friends this morning in Brickfield Maha Vihara. This is my first time of doing such Dana since I entered UM. It's quite fresh for me. I had a long time never do Dana already. I love to do this again in the future.

Then, after came back from Brickfield, I went to the Miao xi group gathering in KPS. It's a nice gathering. KhangZheng and Chai Yu prepared well for their sharing. I felt so guilty as they had prepared it with their heart and yet I was not paying attention. I was too sleepy. Thus, my eyes closed automatically in certain time. Haha...however, i did manage to make it open again after all.

In the afternoon, went to Mid Valley to watch a movie with a friend. I watched "Imagine That". It is a great movie to watch. Recommended from me. It's great movie where it brings out the moral value of the importance of family members compare to career. I love the movie. It's great! It makes me think of my father who passed away. He used to take good care of me and my siblings and my mother as well. We are a happy family. Though he is not here right now, I can feel that he is around me, protecting me whenever I have any problem.

Then, when I reached college again, my friend, Kai Wen sms me and told me that he had finished compose the song that I gave him the lyrics during June. I was so happy. I love the song. It's a great song for me. It's what I want. I love the melody. Tears rolling in my eyes even i had listened to it for more than 10times. I miss you, my dear father...

Tuesday, September 1, 2009



Sunday, August 30, 2009


I have no intention to write this blog today. Just have such a feeling that I couldn't get it away. This feeling stay with me for almost a week. It came right after the mid semester break. The feeling had made me uneasy for such a long time. I have tried my very best to get rid of the feeling. I have tried my very best to chase away the feeling and yet, it still wandering around me. I hate this kind of feeling. It consists of love, hate, jealous and hatred. This is not a good feeling to have. I don't know why. May be I am too sensitive. My friend to me that it is because I too attache to the particular incident or person. May be yes, I guess. I think I am attached to that particular incident and person, both. Attachment makes me feel like that. How do I cut off all these attachments? I don't know. I hate this feeling...I hate it....

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

What Happen to me???

Just finish watch the movie, UP with Ms.Charity, Melissa, Jared, Timm, Amy and Yen. It is a nice and meaningful movie. Anyway, I slept when i watched it. I didn't mean it, but I am too tired. Just forgive me. But, I just slept a while, not more than 10minutes I guess. So, I still manage to catch up with the movie. It is a very meaningful one. I like the old man in the story. Mr. F...I don't know how to spell his name. We just call him MR. F here. He is such a good husband who try his very best to fulfill what his wife wish to do. I feel so touch with what he had done. If I have such a husband, I will have no regret.
After movie, we went to have our dinner in Little Penang. Well, it's nice food for me. Okla...not bad.
Now, I am having meeting for my assignment. I walked here alone. While walking, it is raining. I feel that I am all alone. I started to feel scare. I started to slow down my foot steps. I started to chant the name of Guan Yin in my heart. What happen to me? This is not the old Kai Chur. The old Kai Chur is someone who wil not feel scare at all. Who is so tough and so brave. Where is the old me??? What happen to me???

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Weird feeling...

I feel so weird these few days
After a short break
Everything seems to be

I feel so weird these few days
I don't know what is weird
I just feel that it is weird

I feel so weird these few days
The feeling of familiarity
Not here anymore

I feel so weird these few days
The feeling of love
Gone with the wind

I feel so weird these few days
Can the feeling go away
Back to the time before break

Monday, August 24, 2009

My dearest Kai Jie's convocation

I love this picture. it looks nice with the background.

My kai eldest kaijie not in...

waiting for my kaijie to come out from the dewan

My dearest youngest kaijie and i..

Our Family...nice photo...
18th August 2009, it was a very special day for my family. It was the convocation of my little Kai Jie, Yoke Yee. This is the day where she finally graduated as an undergraduate of the course Applied Physics in UKM. CONGRATULATION!!! on this very special day, the family members of LAM family gather in KL (excluded my mother, as she has to teach in school, so I am the only representative of my family and also my grandmother). We had our family dinner on 17th August. My dearest 3rd aunt flied all the way back from Hong Kong, my dearest eldest kaijie and family came back from Singapore and my dearest kai father and mother came from Teluk Intan. Not forget also my 2nd aunt and family came from Klang to Puchong and we had our dinner in a restaurant here. That night, we squeezed in my kaijie's house in Koi Tropical. It's a nice experience.
Then, the next day morning, we had our family photo session in the studio and then went to UKM. It was a super super hot afternoon where our skin burnt after walking under the hot sun. I became darker after all. Haha.. THis is the first time where i drove in KL. I drove from The Mines to UKM. It's such a great achievement of mine. haha...
It's great to attend my kai jie's convocation and have such a great gathering with my family members. I love the day we gathered. It's the day where the place is full of laughter and happiness. Actually, all this while, my little kai jie, Yoke Yee is a great example for me to further my study in University. She is the one that I used to look up to. She used to study hard when she was in her form 6. Thanks for your encouragement, my dear Yee Jie Jie. I love you!

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Going home....

Wow...finally,after almost one month, I can pack my things and go back to my home sweet home. It's really almost a month that I have not been home. I miss my home. However, today, I am not going back to Teluk Intan straight away, but will go to my uncle's house then attend my kaijie's convocation on Tuesday then only go back to my dearest Teluk Intan with my KaiYe and my 3rd aunt. I am waiting for that moment where my uncle will come and fetch me later. However, in my heart, feels a little bit sad to leave college for a week. Haha...Sounds like I fall in love with my college.'s just because, I'll surely miss the WiFi here and my friends here and not forget, my babies here. I can't bring them home. So, I will surely miss them very much.

Was sending my new baby, little bee to Daddy and ask him to take care of it. So, daddy, remember to take good care of my little bee ya. ^^

Waiting for my uncle to call me....hehe..^^

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Can I have a simple life?

I am a simple girl,
just like what you said.
I just want a simple life.
I need someone to love me,
to take care of me and
to lend me his or her shoulder
whenever I need it.

I hope to go back to my childhood,
where I have no worries,
I have no burden,
I need not think when I spend,
I need not think who will I love,
I need not think will I hurt anyone
if i do this,
I hope to go back to the very childhood.

I want a simple life,
where I can sing whenever I like,
I can sleep whenever I want,
I don't have to worry on my diet,
I can assume everyone love me,
and in deed,
everyone love me.

I love my life being a simple girl,
being a girl without any make up,
without any jewelry,
without any perfume,
just a simple me and
hope you will like it
and accept it.

Monday, August 10, 2009

9/8/09~ A day for me to remember...

This is a day,
for me to remember.
During this day,
I have to remember.

What i have to remember?
It's a secret of myself.
Why shall I remember?
I have to remember.

I can do many things,
which are out of my expectation.
I can do many things,
if I am willing to do it.

I can fly to the sky,
I can swim in the water,
I can play in the rain,
I can if I want to.

There is something,
I miss it.
There is something,
I owned it.

Being a human,
We shall appreciate
What we have
and enjoy it.

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Add on for my BIRTHDAY!!!

jie is waiting for her food..why is it not coming yet???

Finally, nice shoot with daddy..(very hard to make him have nice photo de..)

everyone of us have this noob photo..haha

yen 2...


yen n i are playing and discussing how to make the golden ball smile..haha

em..what to eat ler???

hehe....i wana eat nasi pataya

before we go for our lunch, we need to withdraw money first..pokai d..

Friday, August 7, 2009

My 21st Birthday^^

07/08/09 is my 21st birthday...I had a memorable birthday this year. A special day today as it's 789 and on the 12:34:56 today is 123456789. I won't repeat again. So, it's really memorable to me. Happy birthday to Yee Theng and Min Yi too. I had a great birthday with my friends in 7th Residential College, University Malaya. I had a great outing with my room-mate-Yen, Daddy and Jie on my birthday at MidValley. Glad to receive so many wishes from all my friends, juniors and seniors. Same goes to my family members too.

Birthday cake. THanks June and Amy for searching so hard for my birthday cake..

ugly face after being pushed towards the cake by ANNA a.k.a. BELL BELL

my dearest room-mate. THanks..

Jie and I...thanks jie for the cute little ear-rings.

Daddy and I. This daddy, always show his sleepy eyes..pls lar..can you wake up and take a nice photo with me???

With monkey AMY and cute little LESLEY....thanks girls

With ZHong Weng..this tall girl used to help me a lot..thanks..

with Sin Hui, my almost to-be roomate.

nice hug with soon peng, my Big Hand..

Huggies with my buddy. Love you~

Enjoying my delicious birthday cake~

With Cheng Kim. THanks for celebrating my birthday with me..

With my dearest buddy...Muaks...~

Amy and I ...Two little girls with a cake
Oh yes, it is 07/08/09, the ticket of Rapid KL
Jie and I in Sushi King..Love you~Happy Familly..but lack of 1 people, that is mummy Nana..

nice golden ball with my fingers as the mouth of smiling face..

nice tea...Daddy and I...finally, u open ur eyes...

Daughter and Father acting cute..

Nasi Pataya in Sushi King..haha..~

Cute Little Bee from daddy..i love it...

Nice perfume from my roomate, Yen..thanks...

Nice cupboard from my coursemates..thanks a lot ya^^
Birthday Bear from my neighbours...thanks a lot ya
Little monkey from zhong yuan..thx oh^^

Ear-rings from jie..thanks jie..i love it...almost owned by kian seng's too nice...haha
Ear-rings from big hand, Peggy.thanks big hand..
Birthday card from Daddy..thanks for the surprise too ya daddy..really surprised me...^^
Little letter from my neighbour which made me "pening" almost half an hour to rearrange it and joint them..
Little black pig from Joseph..thanks oh Seph..
These are all the presents. Thanks for my friends. I love you all..

Who is K@i ChuR....I am who I am...

My photo
Teluk Intan, Perak, Malaysia