CC trip 08/09

Wow..i just back from Bagan Lalang yesterday. It's a beach side. A nice place to go. At first, i was thinking, how the trip will be? Will it be a memorable one, a nice one, a fantastic one???? And now i have the answer, IT"S REAL FUN, MEMORABLE, NICE, FANTASTIC and definately, CRAZZYY...
I love the trip so much. We left 7th college at around 10.30am by bus, along the way, i was sleeping..nothing much happened...When reach Sepang, i Woke up, and look around, i was thinking, WhY no beach at all???All i saw is just the palm trees and houses.THen i asked our leader, xue qian, where is the beach, he still balia and tell me the pond is our beach..pengsan...
FInally, i saw the beach.well, it's really a beach, with no sea water...WHY???because it's time for the water to go home and take a rest lo..hehe
Once we reached the apartment, we got into our room, well, it's much more better than what i imagine...2 rooms, 1 living room, 1 toilet and 1 bathroom,quite big for 6 ppl.and it's nice oso..so, have no bad comment. then we have our lunch..OH YES!!pork..haha..have a long time never eat pork d..finally..haha...then we have our games..WOW..super nice,all the 2nd year seniors, i really "pui fok" u all. I know they prepared it for several weeks and have been not enough sleep for many weeks..just for the trip. LOVE you ALL our 2nd year seniors..
then, the night, a memorable 1..WHY???i have a candle light dinner with my fake big hand, andy,well, it's just lucky that they have a lucky draw and im the lucky 1...well, feel so shy when sitting face to face with him,it's like very weird..haha...and then the night, we have a role play game, a real world role play game. WOW...though my group is the last group to start the game, we managed to get num 4..so glad..it's really a nice game and nice experience..and same, thanks to all 2nd years seniors who prepared it so hard for us...
the next day, we have our activities on the beach..so nice...i love all the games...i love the time being in the beach..so nice and relaxing...at night, we really rock bagan lalang, we have our talent nite, then have a dinner where every1 have to pair up with a partner, i got Ah Siong as my partner, a nice gentleman..haha...then we have a rock band from the 2nd year seniors, they are calvin, Nana, my buddy--Jessica, kok Yong, Teng yi, Pek har, ROger..so nice...we rock...7th ROCK!!!...
then the night, slept at 4am, balia with the balia king...know quite a lot of things....
haha
that's my CC trip..i LOVE it...THanks 2nd year seniors...LOVE you ALL
love,
KaiChur

no scholarship...

oh my god..I have no scholarship to take for this year..no.. i should say is for my entire life in UM...the stupid scholarship need me to find 2 guarantors who are below 46 years old in order to approve my scholarship...where am i going to find a guarantor??? I was so worried and so "pik Cheik" when i knew about it...i even argues with my mom...I m so sorry, mom, i didn't mean to do so...I just thinking, I will be a great burden to you if i really can't get any scholarship...Im ur burden now, and yet, if i cant get scholarship, it's really a big burden for u...I'm so sorry..
I cried when my mom phoned and told me not to worry about the financial. She said she can handle it eventhough i have no scholarship..I think it's better to have scholarship...i really don't know how now...helpless...

Missing you...

Suddenly, feel down..
Missing my dearest dad,
where is he now?
i wonder in my heart..

sky are blue,
clouds are white,
wind so strong,
blowing to my heart..

i feel warm,
why do so?
because of the feeling
missing you..

My dear dad,
i really miss u,
miss you a lot...
A lot...

your lovely daughter,
kaichur

Mooncake Festival...

Happy Mooncake Festival..I m celebrating my brother's birthday just now...today is his birthday..and supprisingly, i met with a person that i really hope to meet when i come back everytime,and more supprise is he ask me out for dinner. i din attend anyway, as i hv to celebrate my brother's birthday...im so happy for it..
well,his mom came to my house and have a long talk with my mom,it's usual as my mom n his mom is so close until they can chat alot...now only i know, he is so good guy 1..anyway,that's y i like him so much ...well, it's an impossible mission for us to be together. it's nice to know him more..
i just told him,to forget a person dear to someone's heart needs time. it really need time to forget a person that u love and like...i really love him before,but now,just treat him as my brother and someone that i respect...i know he can manage everything well,i support him all the way..
mooncake festival is a festival that a family will gather and celebrate together..though father not with us anymore, i still feel that he is around me...Suddenly miss him so much...miss the way he talked to me...i read the letter he wrote to me last time, tears drop non stop...i miss him,i really have a long time dint see my dad d....even in dream, i rarely see him d
i can understand how my friend's mom feel as her mom just passed away,i know how's the feeling of lack of someone in the house,i understand well and i feel well...
auntie, be tough and u can overcome everything. I know you can as u always so tough. I support u....
love,
kaichur

家是圆的吗？

缺少了一分子的家，还会是圆的吗？会！ 我很肯定，一定会。我总相信家里的每一分子，无论到了那里，只要心还在家中，家还是圆的。 别因为家里少了一分子而觉得家已不再圆。只要你有心，家还是一样圆，一样的温馨，一样的快乐。缺少的那一分子，也会感受到家的温暖。。。

My dear students...

Though I am busy with my assignments and homeworks now, I feel so sweet when my student gave me a phone call this evening while I was taking my 1 hour nap. Though the phone call woke me up before the time i should wake up, I feel so happy as she informed me about the children's day in her school which will be held on 10 October 2008. She told me that the whole class wish that i can go back and celebrate with them. Unfortunately, I have a camp for my Buddhist Society in UM and a test on that week. I can't make it. I am so sorry, my dear students. I will be very busy for this few months. I was taking up too much of activities and in the same time i need to read for my examination. Anyway, I miss you all so much. I miss the time being your teacher. It's a nice experience for me and it's nice to teach you all as you all are really cute and nice.
My dear students, must study hard and improve your level of knowledge. I know you all can and i trust that you all are good boys and good girls. Don't disappointed me if you all love me, this teacher...
love,
KaiChur

FInally...Phew..

YEs...i guess i did the right choice and rigth job this time...just explained to him..and it's back to normal again..so good...nice feeling....n free...
though i know it might hurt...and it did actually...it's better hurting him now than later.....guess that's the only way i can persuade myself not to feel so upset of it..
may be many ppl will say that im very bad..ya,im ..im bad instead...i noe how hurt it is and i still wana hurt another ppl...stupid n bad .......................
well,i did feel release now..and im happy with my decision and i know im not going to regret at all..im sure..

Am i doing the right choice???

i have answer a yes...is it the right choice???i don't know...time will prove that...but now,i feel so sorry,i dont really want the answer...what should i do????

不知道为什么，突然之间，脑海中浮现了一道问题：“爸爸现在是什么样子的呢？”
爸。。对不起。。。我真的忘记你的样子了。。
好久没有见到爸爸了，有九年了吧。。。
现在的爸爸，在哪里呢？实在人人都向往的世界吗？生活过得怎么样呢？还好吗？有白头发吗？有胡子吗？还是那么的肥肥矮矮胖胖很可爱的吗？脸上是否添加了许多的皱纹？到底爸爸现在怎样呢？我很想知道。。。
九年了，爸爸离开我们也有一段很长的时间了。一声不响的走了，当时的我是多么的脆弱。。。小小的心灵，久久都不能承受如此残酷的事实。。。一再的不停问自己，为什么上天那么的残忍？为什么爸爸那么快就离我而去呢？我不停的想。。。不停的想。。。
到了现在，已有了九个年头了，已经习惯了。爸爸不在身边的日子，我必须比任何人都坚强，开朗，不让任何人看低我。我是坚强的。外表看来而已。内心的我，多么的希望及可望有人呵护与保护。爸爸离去后的日子，我为我自己建了一道墙。一道很高很高的墙。。。没有人能走进我的世界里。表面上，看起来坚强又开朗。实际上，我是多么的懦弱与需要依赖。有人向我说我很坚强，对，我是。但这只是表面。我告诉过我自己，我不可以把握懦弱的一面呈现出来，所以，我永远都是开朗与快乐的。问题都留给自己扛，自己承担。
爸爸现在到底是怎样的呢？我真得很想看一看。有机会吗？又，在梦中吧。。。
爸爸，我爱你！
你要过得比我们好，这样我们才会开心幸福哦！
有空，到我梦中找我吧！
你的女儿
慈

busy busy and busy...

this few weeks, i felt that i m busy for nothing...i m very tired now...super tired...what can i do?assignment...a lot...i hope to study and not to do assignment...really very tired with activities and projects...

How am i going to answer?

It is a very simple question...
I just need to answer either "yes, i can" OR "no, i can't"
And yet,
I can't give the answer...
I don't know what answer should i give...
I feel scare to give the answer...
I scare it is a wrong answer for me and you...
What should i answer?
who can help me?